Recorded by Pain Teens and released on Trance Syndicate in 1995; supposedly the final Pain Teens album. Pain Teens for this release were:
Scott Ayers: guitars, drums, bass, violin, sitar, loops, noises, etc.
Bliss Blood: vocals
Music by Ayers/Lyrics by Blood except:
Moonray (Shaw, Madison, Quenzer)
Invitation (Bronislaw Kaper)
Produced and engineered by Scott Ayers
Front cover photo by Nikki Lewis
Front cover layout and liner notes by Tim Thompson
Thanks to Mike Schneider
Back cover layout by Instant Graphics, Houston, TX
LINER NOTES:
Time has a way of softening the edges of raw cultural excitement. It's difficult for us to remember now the fervor we felt at the end of the 20th century for finding strange beauty in the harshest of landscapes. We sought peace in the whispers of the dead... we caged ourselves within walls of mechanized death, surrounded by the well-oiled whirr and clack of weaponry both psychic and physical... and we found empowerment for change in the cries of the tortured and abused, and finally, ultimately, in silences... most of all. For it was only in the gulfs between notes could each of us meet that which we truly fear.
Swimming, Manouche, Coral Kiss, Accusing Eyes, Swamp, Embers and Ashes, Voluptus, Moonray, Frigid Idol, Skids, The Sweet Sickness, Invitation
Swimming, swimming,
swimming in those arms
whose embrace I knew before
only in my dreams
is a wonder, wonder,
wonder of such beauty
that I'm overwhelmed.
I'm drowning in ecstasy
Sinking into a sea of bliss
Drowning in ecstasy
Sinking into a sea of bliss
We are transfixed
The clouds, the wind,
the trees all whisper
to hush our frenzied fall
The clouds, the wind,
the trees all whisper
to hush our frenzied fall,
falling into the light.
Manouche, the sky is wide
reflected in your eyes
Black as a moonless night,
darkness of starless skies.
Manouche, I fell into
love when I saw your face
For precious moments I
was lost in your embrace.
Manouche, you went away
Your voice lost to my ears
Into the silent sea
I have poured silent tears.
Manouche I'd live anew,
Come back into my arms
Life is cold without you
Without your quiet charm.
Angry little teeth, sharpened
pearl cuts and bitten,
my bruised lips if I miss
your coral kiss, does it matter?
Does it?
Necklace soft, new moon nail
mark pressed so patiently into
my chest if I look for markings
left too late, they're gone
What is meant by moments
spent at little games like these?
I know that I never want to be
apart from you.
Line of jewels around my throat
Broken cloud on my breast, A
hidden bite inside my lip
A little nip, unable to resist, if I
miss your coral kiss
Does it matter?
Does it?
Embers and ashes, sweet-smelling dust
are all that remains of a fire that burned
beyond my control
Embers and ashes, softened by tears
A bitter reminder of the leaping flames
in the depths of my soul
Embers and ashes, a token sacrifice
A visitation and leave-taking
A silent demand
Embers and ashes, irrational longing
for just belonging
to someone I don't understand
Embers and ashes, transparent schemes
Haunting dreams recur to hide my way
to guide my way
Embers and ashes, a book of sighs
A volume of highs, gone in a day
Embers and ashes, drift into the past
Float on a breeze, just out of my grasp
Embers and ashes stain my bed
Nobody's dreams were fit to claim
Your face stains my every dream
Only the embers and ashes remain
Voluptus in your warmth I long to linger
Voluptus in your embrace I long to die
Voluptus be my song, I'll be your singer
Voluptus in forgotten dreams we lie
Voluptus how our bodies intermingle
Voluptus how your lips blot out the night
Voluptus you're a genius of delight
Voluptus take me with you when you sigh
Voluptus, a child, gave me a mystery
We got lost in each other's eyes
His gentle voice filled a void within me
His ample lips silenced my cries
Voluptus, a man, led me into the shadows
Became my earthy primordial god
In darkness he can drown me in the shallows
In daylight he can blind me from above
Frigid idol, I'm cold as stone
I feel my bones break, brittle as ice
The freezing silence in your eyes
The icy shatter of my bones
Brilliant white light of pain
Surrenders all thought away
Forget the twisted excuses
The frozen silence too insane
Burning doll my paradise fades
Amid the radiant, silent flames
I feel nothing as I watch the blaze
Only a twinge, regretful haze
The sweet sickness
is what can't wait
so sweet to know
that it's too late
It's sweet to feel that touch
when not enough
is suddenly too much
The sweet sickness
is what can't wait
so sweet to know
that it's too late.